If vaginas could talk they would tell you they are problematic units. Although vaginas do deliver much joy to the world, they cause their owners a lot of trouble. Come to think of it, they cause a lot of trouble for men, too, but for different reasons, but I digress.
This is an article I have put off writing for a long time because I could not figure out how to approach it but it needs to be written and it is a SERIOUS women's health issue, particularly for pre and post-menopausal women. So at the risk of being laughed at, (or possibly being asked on dates), I am going to tell you about my personal reasons for doing it.
There are multiple reasons for doing vaginal rejuvenation, the most popular reasons being restoring one’s sexual pleasure and halting incontinence, (the peeing of one’s pants …). Incontinence is extremely common in older women, as one can see from the size of the adult diaper aisle in Costco. If your wife/girlfriend sneezes and then runs to the bathroom, you know what is going on.
Neither of these very valid concerns was my reason for seeking help. My reason was sheer desperation. Since vaginal rejuvenation involves a C02 laser where the sun doesn't shine, I was extremely hesitant. But unfortunately, like the other 25% of women who experience chronic urinary tract infections, the regular medical system had zero answers for me. Urinary tract infections affect millions of women and the medical establishment has zero answers for any of them. No good answers anyway.
The common medical “wisdom” is to put women on a continuous dose of antibiotics. This is what specialist number one suggested I do seven years back when the problem began at age 53. I did this and subsequently destroyed my gut microbiome. After learning the health of my gut microbiome was crucial to avoid getting Alzheimer’s disease, (which runs in all the female members of my immediate family), I stopped the antibiotics and tried using alternative methods, which did not work at all. My kitchen looked like a witch's brew station, with pots of weird herbs brewing and other nasty-tasting potions. This method was completely useless, inconvenient and expensive.
Given the choice between Alzheimer’s disease and a UTI, I did my best to try to limp along and pray I could use extreme hygiene to control the situation. I ended up in bed for 10 days, not even realizing at that time that it was a UTI. I thought I had a stomach virus. I ended up at Bluenet Hospital and a very well-respected local Gastroenterologist told me not to worry because this was “normal” for middle-aged women. I was forced to take the antibiotics he gave me or die from an infection that had moved to my kidneys.
During a lunch conversation with two girlfriends who asked me why I wasn’t eating, I spilled the beans on the situation. One of my lady friends told me her friend had the same situation and had used the vaginal rejuvenation laser to solve the problem. I was decidedly unenthusiastic when I heard what the procedure entailed. Having done CO2 laser on my face a couple of times, I couldn't imagine how that would work … it reminded me of a certain priest in the Canterbury Tales and a red hot poker.
Six months later I was back at the hospital being told how “normal" I was and I surrendered to the idea of trying the laser. So I went to one of my anti-aging doctors that I trust completely and he did the procedure. I was pleasantly surprised that it didn't hurt. They just use a local anesthetic and aside from a bit of stinging and some mild embarrassment, it's pain-free. You are in and out of there in 30 minutes and it's painless during and after, although you are strictly forbidden to have sex for one month while it heals.
You will need to do 3-4 sessions the first time around and then one maintenance visit yearly afterwards. These procedures are anywhere from $600-$900 per session depending on where you go.
Long story short, it worked for me. No more UTIS and sneezing is not a problem. Since I looked into how many millions of women are affected I decided to risk the ridicule and write this article. According to the medical establishment, “vaginal atrophy” is incurable, and that’s just not true.
So how does vaginal rejuvenation work to cure chronic UTIS? Good question! As the skin on your face and body starts to wrinkle and sag slightly, the same thing happens to your vagina. UTIs become a frequent problem for middle-aged women because antibiotics never kill ALL of the bacteria. Some of the little devils hide in a crevasse and the antibiotics don't kill them. The bacteria that survive also become resistant to the drugs. So just like the CO2 laser tightens up your face, likewise it tightens up the vaginal wall. A final round of antibiotics after the procedure gets all of the bugs.
At my annual follow-up treatment yesterday, I was told about some other benefits and possibilities of the procedure that I may as well tell you about since I have gone this far … Hopefully, my editor is not going to totally freak out. This may be my last edition of Reverse Your Age with Robyn.
Ahem … I am led to believe there are some “special attachments” for the laser. You can rejuvenate the “G” spot apparently, although I hope the doctors can find it more easily than most men can. There is another attachment for rejuvenating other bits that I just can’t mention now. It’s over the top. And you will be too, so go check it out if you are inclined.
I am now submitting this article immediately before I have time to think about it too much and erase it. As usual, if you have questions, you can Whatsapp me at +526242119435 or email robynlittlewood@yahoo.com. Women only, please!
