In every part of society, the family has long been considered one of the most important institutions of our existence. Yet lately in our Southern Baja California state, a very high rate of domestic violence cases have been reported recently, tearing families apart. Most specifically, here in Cabo San Lucas.
”Domestic violence is more common than people realize, and it is also a very delicate subject. For those of us who have suffered it, where we have been threatened and violated and on many occasions, have been thrown out and left on the street, it is a very nerve wrecking and scary time,” said Alma Mayorquin, Project Coordinator and General Director at House of Peace Los Cabos, a women’s domestic battery refuge center and safe house.
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”There is nothing sweet to say here, if we live lucky enough to talk about it. Violence is real and it happens both at home and in the workplace, it does not matter if you clean houses or own a restaurant on the Marina or a famous sport fishing fleet, or millionaire. It is present in all social backgrounds, it does not discriminate, I have personally witnessed cases of violence against both Mexican and girls from other countries like USA and Canada,” added Mayorquin.
”Our objective is to form a support network, and that in extreme cases the victims can get out of this vicious circle before it is too late and we encourage them to break the silence, not remain silent and join this family project. We seek peace for battered women and the reconstruction of their self-esteem, since in most cases they remain the head of the household.”
The types of violence that battered women endure and suffer are psychological, emotional, physical, sexual, social, economic, patrimonial and institutional. It can range from hurtful jokes, blackmail, and death threats, which all too often leads to murder There are several types of violence that no one should allow and that immediate support should be sought, such as sexual abuse, sexual harassment, intimate partner violence, and family violence, noted Alma.
“A servant wife or partner has suffered almost all of them, I am a survivor of an aggressor who violated me in every way, and that is why I gathered the courage together with other women to carry out this project and thus help other girls,” said Mayorquin.
It is scientifically proven that the damage caused by violence goes beyond physical damage. The psychological consequences are serious and can include low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, insomnia, nightmares, eating disorders and mental health such as post-traumatic stress disorders that can affect an abused women over a long period of time, sometimes causing irreparable damage.
”We are also concerned about minors, since if affects children as well, who are not treated in time psychologically. In their tomorrow they will repeat patterns of violence and aggressiveness against young girls, who generally end up with aggressive boyfriends or husbands because for them it becomes something normal. Living in the environment of violence,” added Alma.
Many times, the aggressors are addicted to alcohol or prohibited substances, but in other situations, they can be narcissistic people with psychological and/or emotional problems. Professionals suggest that they seek psychological and spiritual help such as the guidance of a pastor or priest. There are some cases where men make real changes, which is very good for the family, but unfortunately, these types of cases are rare and few of them ever evolve for the better.
The House of Peace Los Cabos is currently planning for a 2025 year, in which a Los Cabos shelter for women and children is created and sustained over a long period of time. It wants to provide and maintain a safe place environment, a house of peace where female victims feel safe and have a clean bed and a roof over their heads, along with nutritious meals. It wants to provide them with legal and psychological support, with people who listen to them, empathize with their circumstances, and advise as well as guide them.The objective being to connect them with other women in similar situations, where everyone can support each other.
The project consists of having a shelter that provides safety to women who are victims of violence, who do not have a family network or friends to welcome them and their children or, due to the real danger to their lives, they must go to places which can provide them with adequate protection. To achieve this, The House of Peace, will require volunteer psychologists and lawyers, who are willing to donate part of their valuable time and knowledge so that this project can be carried out as soon as possible.
There are not enough shelters in Los Cabos. The most pressing needs are paying rent for the safe house project, while needing to also pay for services such as water, electricity, propane gas, and food. ”We know that there are institutions in charge of following up on these type of cases such as the State Women’s Institute and whenever you are in danger, you should call 911. There is also the support of the purple patrol, which is the physical team that assists the victim at the time of crisis, they pick her up and accompany her to file a complaint against the aggressor and subsequently transfer her to one of the shelters.
”We ask legislators to create therapy programs that are mandatory for the aggressor, such as anger management, emotional management, even while serving their sentence, and, where appropriate, and we pressure government leaders to increase the jail sentence for the aggressors,” said Mayorquin. ”We are thankful and appreciate the clubs that are coming forward to make donations, such as the La Mision Rotary Club, among others preferring to remain anonymous. We also want to thank the Gringo Gazette for the opportunity they have given us to share this information that we hope reaches these women victims and give them a word of faith and hope,” said Alma. ”We also want to create workshops for women to learn skills such as hair dressing, basic computer knowledge, English, cooking, handcrafting, and all kinds of activities that contribute to generating an empowerment for the women and their children,” said Alma Mayorquin. The shelter’s location is private and secret, so women and their children can go there feeling secure. The period of stay is three months, which is called the period of rehabilitation.The Refuge’s capacity is for 10 to 15 families at a time.
For more information or to just help, please contact the bilingual English/Spanish Alma Mayorquin at (624) 100~7941 or email Nidia Ramirez at casadepazcabo@gmail.com.
